I was reminded of a very important lesson for the month of June: the attitude of gratitude.
You know the feeling when your mind is tricking you to over think and then believe in something you are not? I was like that the whole month. I was visiting places, experiencing things I could not really do when I still have work, and seeing my baby grow every day; but there was lurking darkness in my heart that continues to weigh me down. I am a Counselor, and I am very much aware to always see the bigger picture while embracing the negative emotions to be able to sort it all out; that’s what I tell my students, anyway. But it’s hard. Especially that I’m smiling on the outside, all the while, keeping the negatives inside (because I don’t want to worry my family and for others to think I’m in trouble…).
Right in the middle of my saddest day in June, I had the realization that perhaps my mindset was the one at fault. I am always unhappy with my situation. What I have forgotten in the past 8 years of continued working is to become grateful- no matter the circumstance. I tend to look at what’s lacking, not at what’s been given. I lost that ability to see God’s hand in the every toss & turn of my life, to see every single thing as what it really is- a blessing.
Right now, there’s still heaviness in my heart, I won’t hide that. But at least I re-learned to stay thankful to everything that’s happening to me. I’m still waiting for God’s promises to be fulfilled, and his amazing plans to unfold, and I believe that’s also the beauty of gratitude- you have HOPE. I’m thankful because I know that there are reasons behind everything, and these are all for my good.
And who would not be thankful for all these?